August 2010
1 post
1 tag
“I used to be like you. I would put my napkin in my lap, instead of folding it...”
– What made me post to Tumblr after a year off the grid, you ask? This Jack Handey piece in the New Yorker, which kind of blew my mind.
Aug 1st
June 2009
4 posts
Jun 24th
mystery at the pool
(photo: Reuters) Silvio Berlusconi, the prime minister of Italy, is in some hot water for his bumpin’ summer pool parties. But I think the real scandal is what happened to one of his guests: One photo shows an obviously aroused nude man who is identified as Mirek Topolanek, former prime minister of the Czech Republic. “It is me in the photo,” he told journalists, then claimed that the...
Jun 7th
2 tags
Jun 6th
2 tags
Lifetime's "Maneater," the most engrossing movie...
OK. Judging from the poster you might not think this Lifetime movie looks promising. At the very least, you’d have some questions. Is this a movie about a food critic? A cake decorator? A giant? In actuality, Maneater casts aside these piddling questions and asks something much more challenging: Can you build a four-hour film around a cast of characters with no redeeming qualities? The...
Jun 2nd
May 2009
13 posts
1 tag
“Right now, it’s the bottom of the ninth and we are down to our last out...”
– Glenn Beck, patriot, populist, sports fan (via deadspin)
May 28th
1 note
May 22nd
2 tags
May 20th
2 tags
here's one place where Gmail's targeted...
“Colon Cleansing Photos - nugahealth.com - Looking for Colon Cleansing Photos?” No thanks. I’m actually all set.
May 18th
2 tags
off duty, or cops in a bar
Cop 1: Shots! We're doin' shots. What are we gettin'. 151?
Cop 2: Whoa, wait, are you carrying your gun?
Cop 1: No. Are you?
Cop 2: No, we can do 151.
May 13th
1 tag
May 12th
2 tags
baseball insight
Fox Announcer 1: This inning's moving along at a snail's pace right now.
Fox Announcer 2: And if you're the pitcher, a snail's pace is the wrong pace.
A1: A snail's pace is the wrong pace for anyone.
A2: Except for a snail.
A1: Yes, except for a snail.
May 9th
2 tags
May 8th
2 tags
“Thinking of getting a pizza, but can’t decide what to order. Pepperoni?...”
– Steven Seagal, getting kinda philosophical on Twitter
May 7th
2 tags
Movie thoughts: "Ghosts of Girlfriends Past"
Is it really a romantic comedy if you’re being visited by a bunch of dead girlfriends?
May 6th
2 tags
Complete interview transcript: Chris Black, age 6,...
Tatu: [into radio mic] Well, Christopher, I bet you're a soccer fan. Do you have a question about the team?
Chris: Yes, one question. What is your very best move?
Tatu: Um, I, we all have to use all our moves to play the game.
Chris: OK thank you.
May 5th
May 5th
1 tag
Overheard on the bus, near bellevue
Old Woman: How's your head today?
Young Man: Well, my damn vision's came back, so I'm feelin good!
OW: That's good.
YM: Hey, look at this. [pulls out a bag of watches]. It's the goddamn president and his wife, Michelle.
OW: It's beautiful.
YM: I'll give you a deal. Five dollars. And now you'll know what damn time it is!
OW: [laughing] Ooooh, if this doesn't work I'll knock you off your bicycle!
May 5th